Crying - Part 3

How do we respond to the cries of others? If God hears our crying, do we hear the cries of each other? We may look at someone crying and think to ourselves they are being too self-absorbed. They are playing the victim.

"We cannot change what happens to us but we can change how we choose to perceive it or let it affect us," we say. But is this really a healthy approach or just a convenient way for the non-victim to turn a deaf ear to their cries, to not have to deal with the victim's pain or suffering? There are many who continue to cry long after being victimized for no other reason than they lacked a safe, loving and supportive place in which to cry.

Most would see it as absurd to forego any medical intervention for our serious physical ills. In order to heal physically, we must listen to and feel what our body is telling us and respond with appropriate treatment. Changing the way we face physical illness may help us cope, but alone will not heal. Yet we continue to approach emotional difficulties as if they are guided by a different set of principles.

We cannot get over anything when, out of guilt that we have played the victim card too long , we bury our hurt deep within us. It doesn't go away. If instead of having our cry and having our cries heard we have buried our pain or suffering, it will resurface in maladaptive ways. We need to cry and have our cries heard in order to experience their renewing, healing benefits.