When my trust has been betrayed, I am likely to find myself resistant to ever trusting again. This can only result in the rest of life being lived out in fear... which is really not living at all. So how do I get beyond past betrayals so that I can begin to trust again?
One of the points that TV's Dr. Phil often makes is that at any given moment in my life, I do (or have done) what I can (or could) within the limits of my knowledge and experience at the time. It is not my fault if my trust has been betrayed and I have found myself hurt, abused or taken advantage of. Regardless of how devastating the hurt or abuse may have been, there is a sense in which what has happened expands my knowledge and experience and empowers me so I am not as susceptible to abuse or my trust being betrayed in the future.
This means that instead of living in debilitating fear that what happened in the past could happen again, I can instead approach life with some degree of confidence knowing that I am smarter and more aware and that leaves me safer and more secure. I don't need to be afraid of lurking ghosts or the shadows from a dark past because my knowledge and experience will allow me to recognize situations or circumstances where I may find myself vulnerable to being hurt or abused.
Perhaps there is also an underlying sense of shame that my abuse has left me tarnished in some way. This may leave me feeling unworthy of living again, of loving and being loved, of deserving good fortune, success or happiness. The one thing I have in common with all, however, is that we are broken souls, damaged goods. It is simply not possible to walk through life unscathed. Circumstances and experiences abound that leave us bruised and scarred. Yet at the same time I have been redeemed. I have value and purpose that no person or thing can ever take away.
So go forth to live and love. You are not bound or fettered by past experiences of abuse. There is no reason to shroud yourself in fear. Rise up and greet the new dawn!
© Copyright 2006 gentlefootprint. All Rights Reserved.
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